Tuesday, April 5

no falling here

I felt kinda vulnerable all day.
I thought I was going to fall into
the pit of despair any second.
Today was Kindergarten Registration.

It hit me, right in the heart.
If Wyatt were typical,
we'd be skipping off to register him for Kindergarten!
Such a fun event!
He'd be all giddy about starting school,
getting a new backpack & lunchbox,
and playing on the playground.
Mia would be so excited
because she'd have a sibling at school with her
and a buddy brother on the bus.
She would help him learn to read.
My heart would swell,
watching the 2 of them look out for each other.
But here is the awesome part:
It only hurt for a second.
Then I was on my merry way.
things like that would send me
spiraling head first into a black hole.
I would cry, ache, grieve,
moan to my husband
and then eventually, press forward
until the sun came out the next morning.
But on this day,
by gad,
it was beautiful!

I couldn't wait to see my boy come off the bus today.
I knew his cheery & smiley self would
reassure me that he is just perfect the way he is.
That if he were a typical almost-5 year old,
he wouldn't be the Bugg that we know & love & ADORE.

Bugg will go to school next year.
He'll be in a special class.
And we will get him a new backpack & lunchbox.
He will play with new friends
and go on field trips.
Mia will continue doing what she always does:
she'll help him learn textures and sounds,
make him giggle,
cheer him on when he stands or sits and does his tricks.....
and my heart will keep on swelling.


  1. I love this! I know EXACTLY what you mean. I don't know why I'm still surprised, but those moments of grief never seem to stop - even after all of these years. With each phase something will always smack and me make me think, "oh this could have been different." What a milestone for you to be able to move forward so quickly. Sometimes I do and sometimes.... not so much. Most of the time it is quick though - luckily. Thanks for the happy thoughts.

  2. Hooray!!! I'm so glad it was a good day. I love the sunny pictures!

    I am checking your blog from Levi's hospital room. He has pneumonia :(


  3. You have such a gift for expressing your most tender feelings in a way that allows others to see and feel the raw emotions. And then with a whisk of your wrist you whip up the most beautiful, sunny disposition and share it on a heavenly menu filled with love.

  4. The hard part for me is saying goodbye to the kids on the last day of school (p.s. It's on Wyatt's birthday), I cry like a baby!

  5. Thanks for this post, I needed it today. It's perfect.

  6. aw, so sweet. I'm always impressed with your outlook on your lot.

  7. Seeing Wyatt just makes me smile, can't wait to see what the future holds for him :)

  8. I'm so glad it only hurt for a moment!


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